On your second date, you talk about everything from your job to what are your favorite TV shows. You find out that he is a construction worker. This leads to a conversation about how it is so expensive to pay someone to fix something at your house. Without blinking an eye, he offers to do some work at your house at no charge. You tell him it is OK you will pay him. For the next three months he fixes your car, fixes that ceiling fan and installs that air conditioner that had to be installed,

A year later you marry him.. Things go great. Now we know there is no perfect marriage. We also know that there is no man in this world that is perfect. You are delighted that everything he touches works!! this is the man you always wanted….right….

Well what happens next? While your home taking care of the house, he is out helping someone else with their garage door. He constantly has a beer in his hand. That cig in his mouth needs to disappear. Don’t even think of asking him to do the dishes or go grocery shopping for you. That is not happening. This guy is almost like the Macho Man. He has no feminine qualities. I mean, why can’t he cook for me to tonight?

In the end you are grateful that he is your husband. You have a man who is a Mr. Fix-it. I guess you figure that you are a woman and he is a man, so it is up to you to do all the things your mom did for your dad. Even if it means that what he says goes……Where is that perfect man…hmnnnnnnn…..

Once again you have found that perfect man. Wow this man is every woman’s dream. Do you remember when your mom and dad told you to marry a doctor, lawyer or some other money-making professional? Well bang…here he is. You are so happy. Your parents are totally delighted about this fine man.  They are so delighted, that they tell anyone who will listen about how you scored a man who will take care of you. As parents their worries are over. As a woman you feel that you finally have security.

He Is A Great Guy…

What is so great about him? Well first he makes a very decent salary. Have you seen the car he drives? Wow he even has a summer home. How did I ever get so damn lucky?  The last guy I was with was such a hottie. He was a true Macho Man. Now you think back and say…”What the heck was I thinking… he was all into himself” !  This guy I have now is so different. I am in heaven. He does so much with me. I love the idea that now I go out to dinner every night. When I am home at night he calls me. Mom and dad were so right. Thank you God for giving me exactly what I was looking for.

6 Months Later…

Then about 6 months down the road it slows down a bit. OK, so we do not go out to dinner every night. I do not get the long phone conversations anymore. But you know what? I am now living with him in his beautiful home. I hear wedding bells. Things are so much better now. OK, so I must admit…he works a little late every night. Hey at least he is coming home to me. Besides, his house is sooo clean now that I am here. I even have his meal cooked so that when he comes home he can eat and then spend some time with me.

Finally Married…

Congratulations:  you married the man. You are raising the kids on your own because he is still working long hours. Oddly enough, he works even longer hours now. He tries to make all the school activities but he is just too busy. Your kids are involved in after school activities and you find yourself doing a balancing act just to stay afloat. Finally the weekend is here. You can now relax and let him take over. Finally he will help you clean the house, do laundry, cook, shop and shuttle the kids back and forth. But wait….he is just too exhausted to do all this and really needs to relax just one day. The problem is that the next day he is already preparing for work again.

Frustration Sets In…

It gets really frustrating. So much so that you lose interest in sex with him. The both of you are constantly arguing. You argue that you need his help and he argues that he has a lot of work. Think about it..Your man is working 18 hours a day to give you this awesome lifestyle. At some point in your relationship you won’t even care anymore. So you ask that he cut his hours at work so that he can spend time with the family. This pattern continues for years.

It’s A Strain…

Now again,  I am not saying all men who work long hours to provide for their family are bad men. I actually applaud these men for stepping up to the plate and doing what has to be done to continue this lifestyle he gave you. The only thing I am saying is that being a workaholic will eventually put a huge strain in your relationship. A woman does not want to be alone every night. Then again, I know some who would love if their husbands were not home all day and night.

Give Me Some Input…

So again I ask: If you are or have been in a relationship with a workaholic, tell us your story. It could be that he is the perfect husband and you do not mind he works those hours. Let us know what you are thinking.

This is the ultimate man. He is truly macho in every way. He loves football, hunting, drinking, woman, looking good and hanging with his buddies. He is one who is in total control of the relationship. He sets the ground rules. In the beginning of the relationship he is such a gentleman. You are so impressed by everything he does. Why, even after a few weeks,  he is already telling you that he will be taking you on a vacation. You are in total heaven….

Your friends hear all about him and call you on the phone. They are in total shock when you describe your new man. He is such a cutieee. You sit in the car next to him and see his big assertive smile.  It is amazing how just a few weeks ago you were at home on Facebook or some dating site looking for this perfect man all the while your friends were telling you not to worry you will find him and your family was telling you to be careful and how you need a really nice guy. Well guess what mom… I found him!!

Fast forward 3 months from now. He now thinks he owns you. He wants to know where you are at all times. If you hang out with your girlfriends he shows up wherever you are.  He talks to you totally different than he did 3 months ago. He expects you to be home while he is hanging with the fellas. Football season is here….You try and get his attention..you get it after the game. He says he is coming over so you do the dishes, clean the house, cook him dinner and make sure you look great for him. He shows up and eats, Then he gets laid of course and tells you he has to run…This of course happens over and over.

Eventually you marry the guy… Boy that was a mistake in the making I tell ya……It all get’s worse now that you are married. He really owns you now…You want to visit your mom…you’re going by yourself, You need help with the baby, fugetaboutit, need him to do the grocery, wash dishes, laundry…ha ha ha guess again.. Need $300 for a new pair of shoes…”absolutely honey as a matter of fact…Here is an extra $200 so you can go to Victoria’s Secret and get something sexy.

So yes this man will give you the world. But be ready to be a wife who does everything in the house. Do not expect help with feeding the baby or doing house chores…All that stuff is for woman. That is what woman are for. They must take care of their man, the kids and the house…..Yet they are the man of the house. Hmmmm ….who is really running the house….Shhhh do not say that too loud or you may get yelled at like a child. Ohh crap that is another subject..verbal abuse and domestic violence…I will save that subject for another time.

Ladies, in the end, I just want to say that not all Macho Men are like this. I know many, many men who are true macho men and yet they are the best friend, husband and lover that a woman can ask for. But if your going into a relationship with a man who fits this profile, ask him 2 simple questions. How is you relationship with your mom? And how do you feel about woman? You will know by the answer if he is Mr. Right. Remember if he does not get along with mom and feels woman are second to men..Then how do you think he would treat you?

I was born and raised in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. My dad was always out working or disappearing from time to time. That left my mom to raise my 2 sisters and I. Now my mom had no college education. She worked in a factory in Brooklyn and had the neighbors who were Hasidic Jews babysit us everyday. If it was not for their kindness and generosity, I think it would have been nearly impossible for my mom to work.

My Mother knew that at some point she would have to do something to make more money so that she could provide for her 3 children. My mom saw the a local college was offering adult education classes at the local church. Mother knew this was the opportunity she had been waiting for and enrolled in the college night classes. Every night after she came out of work, she would go to the classes. in the meantime we were being watched over by her extremely kind neighbors. They would feed us, do homework with us and everything else a parent would do with their own kids.

After 5 years of working and going to classes, my mom graduated from college with a 4.0 average and a member of Alpha Sigma Lambda. That was the beginning of her teaching us values, hard work and determination.I knew if she could do it…any one could do it.

Over the years she taught me everything from cooking, sewing, shopping, laundry, cleaning to how to treat a woman with honor, respect and dignity. This is where this website comes into play.

I worked in the restaurant business for over 15 years. I was an Executive chef (thanks to my mom who taught me how to cook). During my time as a chef I saw it all….Drunks, sexual harassment, very foul language, putting woman down, aggressive male behavior I mean you would not believe what goes on in the kitchen and at the bar.

From personal experience I also saw how men treated woman and how us we as men feel that we are the MAN in charge. Seriously how many men know how to change a diaper, sew a hem, do laundry all while raising your children who are running around the house like crazy. I bet the percentage is very slim. When you really look at the facts….How many men can survive on their own if the woman was not there and they had to raise their children on their own? If you start with them when they are young as my mom did with me, believe me they will grow up to be that guy every woman wants. If as a man you teach them that woman must do what men say, and they see the way you treat your own woman, well then he will have problems with woman as he reaches adulthood.

I tip my hat off to those who are raising their children, paying child support and treating woman like gold. So you see everyone the purpose of this website is to educate men and educate woman about men. If you have any interesting articles, videos or stories you would like to share please feel free to contact me at itsamanthingy@gmail.com